One Upping!

Good Morning!

I had planned a different post but this morning I had this happen to me and thought it is so true not just for cancer but for all.

My daughter's throat hurts. No fever. She kept whining about it and truly wouldn't stop. I asked if she wanted to stay home and nothing. I knew it would be worse staying at home. I kept saying 'I understand'. Then I started to say YOU don't really understand what I go through. But I had a pausable moment. I stopped and thought she's 9. Her day sucks. Make her feel better. You're 43 and your started out fine beside your daughter complaining.

My rule when people say 'well i'm not going through what you are' or 'my cancer isn't as bad as yours'. I reply with we don't compare journeys. They all affect us differently. An ingrown toenail can be worse than my brain cancer.
#brain #cancer #comparing

I will come back with my other post later. Its short and sweet but about Race for Hope!

Morning Encouragement

I heard this song yesterday morning through heavy tears. I lost my sticky note with the name on it. YAY I found it on my night stand this morning! What another blessing. Anyone want to go see Bethel with me in October? I know that's a long time but I am believing in my brain healing!

https://youtu.be/oFizRY8w0-I

Mornings... This morning my kids did all things so kindly. They shared shower time. No fighting or arguing. I almost had an argue moment with the little man but talked about how I'm praying for self control. I'm not perfect. I had my fun music on and dancing in the kitchen. I made my daughter join me. She stunk. HA! she did it from the couch. You have to get up and make a fool of yourself. Hi Neighbors! Then we went and took and froze at the bus stop. PLUS I got to chat with a neighbor I haven't seen in a while. Also crammed my protein in! NUTS! Now going to get Lucky Charms and morning pills. If you want to feel tired all day come my way. No uppers just lots of downers. A couple keep me alive. The rest keep me up but Jesus provides the smiling. No tears yet this morning!

Sorry for the random thoughts this morning. I could get into potty talk but I feel like we need to move into this slowly before I let it all go. I'm a hot mess! Here's a peak... I carry an extra pair of undies for that great oopsy moment you have at church! YEP that's me and not even on chemo just because why not make life extra fun!

Smooches friends. Leave a comment and let me know you are there.

#cancer #braincancer #morningfun #Bethelmusic

Cancer Blues

I woke up this morning with the chemo/cancer blues. My husband reminded me chemo was tonight and I should start dinner early. I knew this. I've pushed hard to be my name, Sunny. Tried hard to Choose Joy. After hearing my husband say all that, I began to want to cry. I don't cry. I've wanted to cry. I've been praying for God to soften my heart. My mom used to say all the time she couldn't cry because too many bad things happened to her. Then it hit me. Both of may parents died around the time I got brain cancer. Right after my best friend, Granny died. No more weekly phone calls. My husband and I had a tough time. So tears left.

Since I have prayed for a soft heart I have been crying. It is nice but usually just not enough. This morning it was lots. Between songs and texts from my husband and a sweet phone call.

My heart is still heavy. I would like to not be on a chemo schedule at home even though its better than transfusion. I enjoyed my last glass of wine before chemo. TEARS!

I began my morning with worship music to lift my heart and cry my face out. The first song was It is Well from Bethel. https://youtu.be/YNqo4Un2uZI

My second song was on a sticky note and lost with my grocery list. When it is found I will share.

#braincancer #cancer #chemo

Cancer

I'm not sure you notice when cancer is talked about or money is raised it is for certain cancers. Both of my parent had cancer so I hate them all. How often do you hear about brain cancer?

#braincancer #cancer 

Q-Tip

After brain surgery they wrap your crazy head up. It makes for crazy fun pictures. #cancer #braincancer #brainsurgery

The C Word

When you hear the word cancer I'm sure you start feeling bad for that person. It's a very scary word full of unknowns. Even when you have it and hear it your heart gets heavy and sad.

Everyone has been touched by cancer in someway. Both of my parents had cancer before me. My mom had breast cancer and kept it a secret for 7 years. We were told she had 2 weeks to live. God blessed us with many more years. She got to meet my twins. My dad got cancer during that time. He had colon cancer that moved to his liver. Before either died I got brain cancer.

Please post in the comments someone you have been touch by cancer and a little of their story. I would love to pray for them.

On a happy note I went to the oncologist today. My numbers are up. My sinus infection is looking better. Maintenance chemo for 6 months will begin on Monday.

Start praying for no side effects.
#theCword #braincancer #cancer #chemo

                            Playing Catch Up...

I've decided I wanted to start blogging again since my infertility days. I happened upon this blog while looking for a place to blog. I was so confused. What I was reading was my life. I couldn't believe it. Then it was letting me post. My husband came in and read it. He said it totally was my blog. I can't remember so much of life. Last summer is a complete blank and I traveled to two places. NOPE I don't remember. I don't even know I have followers. 

Please know if you don't do God then you don't want to do my blog. It will be a big part of this blog. 

My catch up... I did a round of chemo in pill form with my second set of brain cancer which was recent. I also did radiation. I've lost my hair on the sides because of it. I'm no longer a Q-tip but a skater girl.  During radiation I became Hannibal Lechter. Pictures will follow one day. I'm still blown away how I don't remember this blog.